74 Inches of Pure Lady

My mom used to tell me that life didn’t get really good until your 30s. When I was in my 20s, I didn’t understand what she meant.  At the time, I couldn’t imagine life being more awesome. But now that I’m approaching my mid-30s,  I fully understand what she meant.  My 30s have been rough emotionally and professionally but I feel happier with myself than I’ve ever been.  I realized that I spent most of my teens and 20s, not unlike most women, grappling with low self-esteem and confidence issues.    In less than six months, I’ll enter my mid-30s and I’ve never felt more confident.  Most of my life I felt like I got hit with a body trifecta that made me hyper-sensitive and self-consciousness but ultimately for which I am supremely grateful.  There is no way I’d be the confident, happy human being I am today if I weren’t three things: female, Black and super-duper tall. The point of this post isn’t that the key to happiness is being a 6’2″ black woman. Because if that was the key to happiness about 2% of the population would be happy. The point of this post is that there is unquantifiable power and strength in embracing who you are.  I have been discriminated against, harassed, objectified, dehumanized and assaulted based on who I am. But I’ve learned that the problem isn’t me. I’m awesome. The simple truth is that some people are ignorant, some people haven’t met any minorities and just don’t know what they’re saying or doing and some people just plain suck. But, at the end of the day, none of those people’s opinion about me matter. I determine my self-worth.  Continue reading →